Joy does not simply happen to us. We have to choose joy and keep choosing it everyday – Henri J, M. Nouwen

I want to dedicate this blog to those women who have played a significant role in my life as both an adult and child because these exchanges of energy are powerful and the connection we have experienced I’m sure has been mutually exchanged.

It can be a hard emotion to write about and feel for some. I want to expand on this more as the inner feelings I have for people in my life translate to Joy. When I think about the people that I cross paths with and continue to have in my life I realise that they are by choice, and as I get older, the meaning of people has changed for me.

If they no longer serve me, I am being kind to myself and letting them go. Being so far away from my people at the moment really has been a test of their importance to me, and even though we are separated by distance, I cherish the times we did spend together and the bond that we created that has been able to withstand the challenges of the time we now live in. In doing some research on this bond, I came across an article that sums up some valid points that I would like to expand on and that I feel are relevant to modern-day friendships, which for me, appear in various forms. Not discounting other forms of relations, but friendship is a special bond and one that can sincerely change your life if a connection with the right person is made.

I have been very fortunate and blessed to have such positive and inspirational people in my life that the universe has allowed me to connect. Regardless of the what, where, why, and whom the mutual understanding and unspoken words/thoughts we share is so fulfilling. The sense of affection between us is a common understanding of appreciation. Let me share some reasons why friendship is the best bond:-

• It is a bond that cannot be replaced. It is unique between two people.
• It nurtures you as a person and gives life to your soul. Friendship allows for support and brings positivity into your life.
• A relation without ego. Having the ability to resolve issues without your ego is the norm.
• No pretending. You can be yourself without judgment
• It can be more than it is e.g. The connection allows for you to relate as siblings, parents, best friends, lovers, and well wishes.
• Full-time support, the role can be your support when you need it the most
• It is the bond of expression. No spoken words are needed.
• It gets stronger with time. You love them without reason and their beauty and presence in your life are so sincere (Caleidoscope.in)

Some friendships can be terrible and life-changing, so it is important to watch for the red flags. If you feel the friendship is heading in the wrong direction you have to make the call and sever the tie. This can be hard especially when you have known each other for a long time. I had this experience in my life, and it really upset me but also caused me to assess what had gone wrong. How does someone that you have known since childhood suddenly turn? I blame it on the ego and different life journeys, I took the time to grieve initially and then this loss opened up an opportunity for me to focus on other things.

When a friendship feels like it’s too much effort it usually is. There should be a mutual understanding and a sense of comfort and trust like I have experienced with a very special friend in my life. We crossed paths in the playground back in 2007 and have shared many experiences in life. I appreciate her support and know that she is never far from my thoughts as we both navigate through life.

Reflecting back on joy, I feel it when I connect with my people. They can pick me up from my darkest and make me feel special which I am eternally grateful for. We often meet after not speaking or seeing each other for months and pick up where we left off and we always have an awesome time. Time is something we never have enough of it just seems to disappear. I’m sure that I am not the only one to experience this and it reminds me of how precious it really is.

A good friend glances over your damaged fence and appreciates the beautiful flowers – Caleidoscope

Dedicated to these powerful women – Brooke, Chris, Dori, Nicole, Di, Angela and Claudine.